Liz's new fad.
Strip off clothes (which is a very complicated procedure in itself as she can never work out which limb has to come out of which hole... and buttons get stuck in her hair and then she falls over her pants as she tries to clamber out of them and anyway its no fun trying to get leggings off when Crocks (god i hate those shoes but i love them too because they're so easy to take off put on take off put on...) are still on feet. Its kind of like something from Rodney in Only Fools and Horses - just always getting it not quite right.)
Go into the garden.
Find some nice looking grass.
Pose strangely. Like a New Zealand Rugby Player doing a Hukka(?) she stands there, naked, legs akimbo, chest out, proudly like a peacock (or New Zealand Rugby Player). And then she pees. But she only does a mini-pee. And then she shuffles, like a crab or something else that moves sideways, to another spot on the grass, and pees again. And then, one more shuffle sideways, she does another pee.
Then, ritual over, she goes off and continues with whatever she was playing with before. Oblivious to her very wierd behaviour and oblivious to her nakedness. she just picks up where she left off.
I always thought she was a bit like a bear of little brains, and now I wonder if she's actually related to some sort of terrier or king-charles-spaniel?
And finally will my grass die overnight? And actually, this is my final question: is toddler pee good to scare off snails?
I tried to remind my children that it is my birthday tomorrow. I may as well have told them that the FTSE one hundred was down again on closing tonight.
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3 comments:
actually wee should keep the foxes away...we positively encourage this behaviour :)
I've always been told that boy's wee is good and girls wee is bad for grass. let us know if any scorched patches develop in the grass...
Is Liz like a burly all black writing a haiku (delicate Japanese poem - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku) or a burly all black performing the Haka - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83U_Vg1GRvA
or maybe it's a mixture of both of them.
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